Xmas Eve

Today I ran 2.89 miles. It is, again, the furthest I've run. I think that things are going to get easier as I go. Today I dont feel nearly as dead as I felt yesterday when I ran. On other notes, today is Christmas Eve, but it really doesn't feel like it. For some reason, I feel like Christmas has already happened. On an unrelated note, I cut my hair, and I'm not sure if I really like it or not. It is really difficult to deal with, but it is convenient, because while running, I have no hair whipping around all over the place. I think that I've decided to run the Chicago Marathon next October. I've heard nothing but good reviews about it, and I've heard that the fans are awesome. I think that crowd support is something that I am really going to need to depend on, since I dont have a training partner. If Chicago doesn't work, I'll probably try for the White Rock Marathon. It's less good, but it wouldn't require any travel expenses, which would also be really great. So, we'll see.

Marathon Update

Marathon Training Update: Today was only the second time I've run since I've been home. It's been really frustrating because my right knee has been killing me lately, and so, consequenty, I haven't been able to run. I was really looking forward to getting some serious running in while home, but it just hasn't panned out that way. On the brighter side, I went the furthest I've ever been (a meager 2.23 miles) but, it's a start. I just have to keep remembering to push myself a littel further each time and to not get frustrated. I think that's it for this post.

Streetcorner Symphony

Some people, It's a pity, they go all their lives and never know how to love or to let love go. But it's alright now. We'll make it through this somehow. And we'll paint the perfect picture, all the colors of this world will run together, more than ever. I can feel it. Can you feel it? Come on over, down to the corner, my sisters and my brothers of every different color. Can't you feel that sunshine telling you to hold tight? Things will be alright. Try to find a better life... Come on over, down to the corner, my sisters and my brothers. There for one another... Man I know you want to let yourself go. We may never find our reason to shine, but here and now, this is our time. And I may never find the meaning of life, but for this moment I am fine - Rob Thomas "Streetcorner Symphony". This (very long) quote is so perfect for this moment in my life today. I think that I just obsess too much about trying to control my life and every single situation that occurs in it. Today has been, simply stated, a complete and total disaster, and one of the best days I've had in a long time, all magically rolled into one. I have been learning a lot about myself these days, and I think that I just really need to let some stuff go. Like this song says... I know you want to let yourself go... I may never find the meaning of life, but for this moment I am fine. This is the way I ought to view my life. The things that we (and by we, I mean I) view as "important" (grades, work, pleasing other people) are really so trivial when you think about the bigger picture. When was the last time I had a good long conversation with my Mom? Or called my best friend just to talk? It's these things, these relationships that will be more important in the end than any "A" we make on a paper, any promotion we recieve at work or any validation we could possibly recieve from another. Sometimes we just need to stop, take a breath, "go down to the corner" and stay for awhile.

Revisiting the Blog/ Where is God in College?

This is my first voluntary blogging experience. I was required to keep a blog for my Rhetoric classes last year at SMU, but I finally decided to use it for therapeutic purposes instead. Also, I became somewhat inspired at reading the postings of a new friend of mine. So - here we go. Recently, a lot has been on my mind concerning God and his place in the life of a college student. This year, I must confess, I have been struggling with my faith constantly. I see people all around me who don't really care about God, or if they do, don't show it. They seem to be living perfectly happy, fulfilled lives, and I wonder... I'm a Christian, and I still don't seem 1/10th as happy as they are. Why? Well, the answer, has been presented to me recently as clear as day. God's side of the bargain only works if we do one simple thing: Be OBEDIENT. Now, this has been a major pitfall for me, because I am a) a control freak, and b) a know-it-all. Obedience has never been at the top of my expansive priority list, because I am usually consumed with being obedient to my own goals and wishes completely independent of others. This is bad. I recently have realized that I NEED people. I NEED God. God is not some "mean kid on an ant hill with a magnifying glass, and I'm the ant" (courtesy of the movie "Bruce Almighty")... and I digress... This is not the purpose of God in our lives. He does not serve to be a harsh and ruling master that forces us to submit to impractical rules in order to receive his favor. God gives us rules, guidelines, and morals so that we can be blessed. Well now, isn't that a concept... God loves us in spite of who we are... There is an AMAZING song that I have been listening to, and it's by Chris Tomlin... It's called "Indescribable"... The one line that always gets me goes something like this, "incomparable, Unchangeable, you see the depths of my heart and you love me the same...". This is so true. All God requires of us is that we be obedient. Even if we have messed up, and doubted him. He still loves us just the same... That's it.